


Upward Comparison

by Missy



Category: Jolene - Dolly Parton (Song)
Genre: Established Relationship, Jealousy, Longing, Love Triangles, Multi, POV First Person, Pining, Rural, Trick or Treat: Trick, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2021-01-03 05:31:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21174233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/pseuds/Missy
Summary: As Princess Diana once said, there are three of us in this marriage.





	Upward Comparison

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HerbertBest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HerbertBest/gifts).

There are, as Princess Diana (god rest her sparkly soul) once said, three of us in this marriage.

There’s her – and she’s beautiful, sweet, kind and perfect. Then there’s me; I don’t pick up your clothing when you come home. I expect you to bring me to nice places. Put down the toilet seat. Talk to my mamma when she calls on the phone. I’m like a bowl of oatmeal; she’s a plate of oysters.

Even though I know she can’t be that perfect, when I look at her, I burn.

It’s the kind of wanting you never really get over, not the kind you ever get used to. It shakes up everything you thought you knew about yourself.

Is that what you feel when you look at her? 

What do you feel when you look at me?

Am I old-hat, holding the baby in my arms, wiping their noses? Weird and unpretty, smelling of motor oil and spit-up? Is there something else I could do? Kiegels? A new hairdo?

What could I even do to compare with her?

She must fart in her sleep, or pray to Satan at night. She can’t be that cloud of perfect, running around through the night. Maybe she sold her soul to a man at a juke joint. I don’t know. She’s to pure. Too nice. 

There must be something wrong, somewhere. With both or one of us.

Don’t just sit there and laugh at me. Make up your mind. Her or me. Me or Her. You can’t have your cake and eat your roast beef. If you want to find out what if feels to kiss her, do it. Get it over with. Make sure you know what you’re doing before you do it.

And if you can’t choose between us, I might just go ahead and choose her. See what it’s like on the other side of the pillow.


End file.
